Your room should be your sanctuary.
How can it be when every time you open your closet to get dressed, a pair of jeans triggers bad memories, poor body image or low self-esteem?
Today, I am proud to say I threw out all my skinny clothes. I had a Banana Republic fitted dress that I wore to professional cocktail parties. I used to feel like Cameron Diaz in that thing. Boy, was that hard to let go of.
I’ve been holding on to clothes I kept around just to remind me that I could lose weight at anytime, that I needed to lose weight, that I would eventually lose weight again. The only way I can explain it is. By comparing myself to a drug addict holding onto a pipe for a “just in case” moment..
Yes, I’m sober from my eating disorders. I have moved on… But, those Brazilian jeans were still in my closet, that dress, shorts from juniors departments, yoga pants for giraffes. “Someday,” I would think, “For when my life falls apart again and getting skinny will be the only answer.”
Nice, right? Well, today, I tossed all of it into the giant bag destined for Goodwill. Most likely, a teenager will swipe up those Brazilians in a heart beat.
I now try to perceive the physical aspects of women in a different way, a retro way, appreciating the curves that accompany her, when she has stopped starving herself and has decided to be what she was meant to be, a woman.
Tips for Getting Rid of Your “Stressor” clothes
1. Step out of denial. Try the clothes on. Do they fit? Do they fit so that you could wear the piece to work or to a movie and sit comfortably? If the answer is no, let it go!
2. Invite a friend or your parter or mom etc, basically, invite someone you trust to support you during the process. He or she is there to remind you how throwing away a pair of pants you never wear is as simple as throwing out a candy wrapper.
3. Make sure you have clothes you like that you feel good in before you get rid of all your old stuff. Once I did a little shopping and saw how nice the new clothes fit, the old stuff looked that much more meaningless. If you haven’t shopped in a while, do so. You deserve a fresh start.
4. Get rid of anything that reminds you of a traumatic or stressful experience. Avoid having to relive moments you have already survived.
5. Talk out loud. Tell your companion stories about some time you this or that. Oddly, it’s sort of validating. It also put things in perspective for me. Most likely when you were at that unhealthy weight, over or under, you were going through a difficult time. Reminiscing, enforced truthful and positive thoughts like, “wow, thank heaven I’m not that phase anymore,” “I’ve come so far.”
6. Always remind yourself that your clothes aren’t supposed to make you feel badly; they’re supposed to make you feel good and ready for anything.
I’m so pleased to announce that three of my poems, “Slots,” “Scraping” and “Make a Decision” have been published in Barking Sycamores Literary Magazine Issue 13. Barking Sycamores is dedicated to neurodivergent literature and its craft. I’m so honored to be a part of this project. Barking Sycamores Issue 13
A stereotype as defined by Merriam-Webster is “an often unfair and untrue belief that many people have about all people or things with a particular characteristic.” Colloquially, the term, stereotype, “is used to categorize a group of people. People don’t understand that type of person, so they put them into classifications, thinking that everyone who […]
Susan J. Fowler, a former employee of Uber, published a post on her blog revealing numerous counts of sexual harassment and discrimination she experienced while working for the company. Her post is straightforward and pretty bias-free; her tone is calm, but frank. While some of her experiences at the company might appall readers, her author’s […]